Mahir Manot
From isolated to broadcaster: Mahir's story
Mahir found his voice after six years of bullying silenced him, discovering that uplift, not volume, is what breaks isolation.
Hear this story
Kintsugi Studio
Mahir Manot
Mahir found his voice after six years of bullying silenced him, discovering that uplift, not volume, is what breaks isolation.
Hear this story
Mahir walked into year seven as an energetic, curious kid who loved sport and friends. He broke his arm weeks before starting at a selective boys' school, arriving on day one already marked as different. His expressive nature and big reactions to things became entertainment for other students, who learned to provoke him just to see how he'd respond.
For six years, rumours followed him between friend groups, blocking any real chance to make a first impression. When he tried to join new people, they already had preconceived notions about him. Two genuine friends arrived in year 11 and became his protection. Then, the day before his HSC exams, fifteen students tackled and pinned him down during a school water fight. A teacher on the bus home saw him crying and warned him about the serious cost to his mental health if he stayed silent. His mother knew something was wrong without being told, broke down with him, and called the school to demand action.
Mahir wanted to join the Navy for a gap year to reset, but missed the intake by one percent on a lung capacity test. He walked into a journalism class at university instead and found people with the same energy and curiosity he'd had in primary school. Everything he couldn't express in high school came pouring out. On a nine-day volunteer trip across regional Australia with eighty strangers, sleeping on church floors with minimal rest, he finally found the deep friendships and shared adversity he'd been searching for since high school ended. His message now: use your voice to uplift others, not to drown them out. The longer he stayed silent, the worse he felt. Speaking up made all the difference.
⚠️ Content advisory: this episode discusses abuse & exploitation, which some listeners may find distressing.
If you need support, you're not alone. Help is available: • Blue Knot Foundation (complex trauma): 1300 657 380 · blueknot.org.au • 1800RESPECT (family, domestic & sexual violence): 1800 737 732 · 1800respect.org.au
“They've already formed preconceived notions of who you are because of the bullying and because of the rumours that have been spread. So you don't have any chance to make a first impression on a new group of friends.”
“Use your voice, but use it not to drown the voices of others, but to uplift the voices of others.”
“By the end of the nine days I was in tears that I couldn't believe I found these people that I was in search for for since the start of high school.”
The hero, today
The rumors that follow you between friend groups can be as damaging as the bullying itself, because new people never give you a chance to show who you actually are. Six years of verbal abuse before the physical attack in year 12 built a shield of numbness that kept the worst moment from destroying his HSC exam results. Finding university classmates with the same energy and curiosity he had in primary school unlocked everything he'd been forced to hold back during high school. The deepest friendships he's made came not from nights out or parties, but from sleeping on floors with strangers, helping rural communities, and going through real discomfort together. Using your voice is only half the answer, the other half is using it to uplift others instead of drowning them out, which is what he needed someone to do for him.
Yes. Mahir Manot is a real person who shared their own story in their own words. Kintsugi Heroes is a not-for-profit that shares first-person stories of overcoming adversity, told with the person's consent.
Kintsugi Heroes, a registered Australian not-for-profit. Every story is shared with the hero's own consent and reviewed under Kintsugi Heroes' trauma-informed content standard before it goes public.
The rumors that follow you between friend groups can be as damaging as the bullying itself, because new people never give you a chance to show who you actually are.
Six years of verbal abuse before the physical attack in year 12 built a shield of numbness that kept the worst moment from destroying his HSC exam results.
Finding university classmates with the same energy and curiosity he had in primary school unlocked everything he'd been forced to hold back during high school.
The deepest friendships he's made came not from nights out or parties, but from sleeping on floors with strangers, helping rural communities, and going through real discomfort together.
00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:18,000 Welcome back to Kintsugi Heroes, helping people tell the stories they need to share so you can find the stories that you need to hear.
00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:44,000 Not everyone who experiences bullying finds their way through. Mihir Munod did, and he wants to show others they can too. Growing up full of curiosity and potential, Mihir's high school years tested him in ways no young person should face. But he pushed through, found his people and discovered a powerful passion for journalism and law.
00:00:44,000 --> 00:01:14,000 And now at university and speaking up about mental health, Mihir joins Kintsugi's Mark Henderson to share the story of how he turned his darkest chapter into his greatest strength. Hello, today I've got Mihir Manute on the line for a Kintsugi Heroes podcast. My name is Mark.
00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:31,000 Henderson, and we have a wonderful story about a young man who is kicking goals, enjoying life, but had come from a pretty tough spot. And I would like to introduce you to Mahir. So welcome again, Mahir.
00:01:31,000 --> 00:02:00,000 Hello, Mark. Hello to whoever's listening in the amazing Kintsugi community. It's so great to be here. And I think I am really excited to see how this goes. My first ever experience or my first ever time I heard about Kintsugi Heroes was when I actually interviewed Ian. So quite the opposite switch around of roles. And it's good to be sitting in the interviewee spot and listening to, well, what's going to be coming from you. So welcome and welcome to our listeners, however you are digesting this material today.
00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:15,000 We're going to hear about Mahir's story. I might just hand to you, Mahir. You said you were a budding young student at school not too many years ago, but you had a tough time.
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This conversation includes a curious kid with energy to spare, arriving at high school with a broken arm, the animated reactions that became the target, the rumor that follows him between friend groups, two friends become his armor and the water fight before the hsc.
00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:45,000 Can you take us back there? Yeah, yeah, I did. So I'll take you back to the very beginning, to primary school, actually. So before high school, I was always, always, and I think it came from first playing cricket, was always a very, very energetic kid and a very curious kid. If I were to put two traits to myself growing up, it was energy and curiosity. And that's been a constant throughout my life, even to today. I mean, that's why I studied journalism.
00:02:45,000 --> 00:03:10,000 and I in primary school had the best time ever I mean I was like you know I was playing sport playing handball at lunch and recess I loved the group of friends I was with going to the park after school before school local school so just walked to the school as well with my friends and it was it was going amazingly and I was yeah I was born and brought up in Australia so I was you know I was
00:03:10,000 --> 00:03:37,000 It wasn't even like I had a English as a second language. So English was, I was never an ELD student. So I was very much involved in the student kind of experience in primary school. Then as year six approached and the entire primary school experience was nearing to a close, it was time to decide which high school I was going to go to. And I ended up going to a school, quite high performing school. It's a very good school, amazing teachers, amazing resources.
00:03:37,000 --> 00:04:07,000 And because of its high-performing nature, it was quite small in size. I remember a month before or two months before, I think it was a month and a half before actually, starting year seven, I was at a year six reunion and I broke my arm just trying to do some funny parkour stunt in the park ovals. And I was the only kid walked in with a big sling on my arm, you know, covered half of my body because I was this tiny in year seven, hadn't even hit puberty yet.
00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:26,000 Instantly, like the first thing is, well, how'd you break your arm? You look like just visually I'm already looking different. Right. So that was my first ever encounter with high school. I walked in with a broken arm and that didn't really mean anything, but it's just something that I keep in mind when I draw the dots back as to how everything played out.
00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:57,000 And I noticed that when I tried to evoke and when I tried to bring that same energy and curiosity and asking questions left, right, center to make some new friends and make as many friends as I wanted to in year seven, I didn't quite meet the same level of energy and curiosity in return. Because I don't know whether it was on my end or the part of the other people, but I was expecting that same primary school level energy to be present. And because it didn't meet and because I was always a very energetic kid,
00:04:57,000 --> 00:05:21,000 And it's slightly turned around where, well, what if we poke him here and he shows a big display of reaction and a big display of energy? That's pretty funny to look at, right? So I would often get pulled into groups and friend groups because I would have such animated reactions at things that didn't go well and things that didn't go to plan. So, for example, you know, if I was hanging around with a bunch of kids and they took my water bottle and they chucked it in the drain or something.
00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:42,000 They would love to see my reaction as to where did his water bottle go? You know, and I'd be very animated because I was just that kind of kid. I was a very expressive kid. So naturally I did drama and I did all of the performing arts and the histories and the legal studies and all of that. And it wasn't until year 10.
00:05:46,000 --> 00:06:12,000 Did I first face this so-called bullying? Because, sure, I was, you know, I was getting the jokes. I was getting the small-time games being played on me. And I always took it as a joke, right, because I just thought maybe it's in high school. You know, you've got to up your skin. Surely everybody else is dealing with this. Was it a co-ed school? Was it a co-ed school or a single-sex school? No, it was a little boy's school or boy's school.
00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:40,000 And going into year seven, did they have a junior school of their own school? No, no, no, no. Very small school, seven to 12, all in the same school, all in the one campus. Everyone knew everyone. And so you're in year 10. Do you have your own... Do you have a good friendship group or is it a bit loose or where's that sitting for you? So, yeah, so that's actually the perfect time you've picked because at that point, I...
00:06:41,000 --> 00:07:10,000 Was like, you know what? These jokes are getting quite often. And I just wanted to have a few normal conversations as well. Anytime I wanted to have a conversation, it ended up either being me picked on for fun. And I was like, yeah, you know what? I'll take it. It's just the normal experience of there's always one kid who gets picked on. There's always one kid who gets made fun of. It's not really bullying. But then it just didn't stop. And I was like, you know what? Let's just take a break. See if I can make a few other friends. But this is, I think, what the most overlooked and the most... What can have one of the biggest impacts of bullying is...
00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:31,000 Sure, the bullying itself is terrible, but it's the first effect that comes out of bullying, which is when you go to someone else in the grade, when you go to another friend group, so to speak, they've already formed preconceived notions of who you are because of the bullying and because of the rumors that have been spread. So you don't have any chance to make a first impression on a new group of friends.
00:07:31,000 --> 00:08:01,000 And because of that, Mark, they already have this idea of, oh, this guy is the ugly duckling or the person who got left out because of this rumor which was spread. So why should we invite him or why should we treat him the same way as every other friend? Because this is what we've heard. But they've never actually got a chance to play with me or to actually conversate with me. And I think that's what pissed me off more than anything else. Because I didn't have the chance to make a new friend, because of the initial kind of jokes being played and the rumors being spread,
00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:22,000 be my full emotive self. And I was constantly suppressed whether I wanted to share an idea, share a story, share just a fun event that happened, you know, even just share if I did well in an exam, whatever it was, what I brought for lunch, whatever it was, right? It was always met with some sort of filter because they'd heard about me in the past. They'd heard about why I left this friend group.
00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:48,000 And I think that element is something that isn't talked about as much because the focus is on the bullying. Because a lot of the time it's physical bullying. A lot of the time it's pretty bad exclusion. But it's the flow-on effects, which are just as bad. Because if you have notions being made out of you and you don't have an opportunity to bring your full self, and it's just like in the profession right now, if you go to a networking event or you go to a job interview, very...
00:08:48,000 --> 00:09:00,000 It's the other way around where they've seen your resume, they've vetted you, they've got a great first impression of you, they want to meet you. This is the opposite. They've got a terrible first impression of you and you're forcing yourself into that group because you've got no other option because you don't want to sit alone at recess. You don't want to sit alone at lunch.
00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:24,000 And hard to be genuine and authentic. You're trying to overcome a preformed narrative. Exactly. Very difficult. I'll take you to a specific example because I know it's sounding very broad right now. And it's probably, it may be a universal experience for someone listening, even if it's one person listening. I mean, at that point, I thought that I was the...
00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:32,000 I wasn't the only person suffering the jokes. But then it moved on from the jokes to...
00:09:34,000 --> 00:10:01,000 Every time I would walk in the corridor, even if my shirt was untucked, five boys who were walking together would come up to me and ask me about 10 questions about why my shirt is untucked, how I got to school this morning, why I said this in class, why I spoke like this, why did I bring this pen, why? And it was just terrible. And I was, you know, like, and then the days to come, I would start ducking the windows so people wouldn't see me. And I would just go to a room by myself and either study or I would have like a small...
00:10:01,000 --> 00:10:29,000 small group of two friends because in year 11 an amazing thing happened where they introduced 15 new students to the grade and out of those 15 new students I made two friends for the first time it was almost like a lifeline because from year 7 to year 10 I couldn't make the impression from year 11 for the first time I had the opportunity 15 new friends it felt like I was given an opportunity to move schools almost and the only reason beware probably your audience are thinking why has he not moved schools why has the parents not told him to move schools why have they not taken him and put in another school
00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:52,000 Because the school was so great and I knew that all I had to do was just deal with it till year 12. We had one of the best careers advisors ranked very, very high in the state. It was an outlier of a grade or it was an outlying experience. Students usually don't have this sort of experience or at least they don't talk about this sort of experience. They may very well be having it at my school. And I was like, I cannot let a bunch of people
00:10:52,000 --> 00:11:18,000 remove me from my academic potential from this school because I knew I'd just get dragged down at another school so I was like no matter what happens I'm staying in the school but it was difficult because then in year 11 I was just with these two people and any time around the school corridors any time around the basketball courts wherever I was I tried my hardest to always be with those two people because if I wasn't then I was an easy target and because those two people almost felt like they were like my
00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:46,000 bodyguards or armor where like they would see me and they would see two people and they'd be like oh well he's with the new kids so let's not pick on him doesn't look good that's what i was thinking and every time i was by myself i would get stopped in my tracks and asked 100 questions at once and even on the train home even on the train there you know come home a few days crying i'd sit in one place in class everyone would move to the other side you know the days they were sick i had no one to hang out with but i think it was always
00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:58,000 It was always verbal. It was never physical, and I didn't think it would get physical. And then the day before the HSC, so the exams, which determined...
00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:28,000 which, well, which give you a pathway to university and tertiary education, arguably the most important exam that you will first sit in your lifetime if you do go to school and you take it all the way. The day before, we had a whole school water fight, right? And it was a great day. It was a sunny day. I'm glad we had the water fight. Everyone came dressed up. It was so exciting. You know, I was happy the entire day. I couldn't wait till the water fight. Everyone was waiting for it. And then...
00:12:28,000 --> 00:12:51,000 we were doing the water fight and it was two, you went for like two to three hours. We had a slide going into the school level. It was amazing. I was like, this is going great. Can't wait till the exams tomorrow. And then the teachers start to say, oh, let's start packing up now. And, you know, start to walk up. But then I realized that, oh, I think I dropped something out of my, my,
00:12:51,000 --> 00:13:04,000 My pocket, something it was. So I had to go back to collect it. And then as I'm coming back up the hill to walk up to get my bag and everyone's, you know, the two friends I was talking about, they're waiting for me already in the change rooms. They've got their bag. They're like, hurry up and get your bag and come up. I'm like, yeah, I'm coming to get my bag.
00:13:07,000 --> 00:13:34,000 One of the guys from like back in year seven, the very first group of friends I had, which first I left one of them, he's a big guy and he's, he's a tall guy, big sporty guy. He was just blocking the way for me to get my bag. He's like, you're not getting your bag. I'm like, what do you mean? Can I just, can I get my bag? Is that all right? Is there any issue? Did I do something? And then I looked to my right and then there's 10, every single one of the 10 bullies who've been at it for the last six years, just sprinting towards me.
00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:42,000 And my heart has never dropped faster. I was...
00:13:42,000 --> 00:14:07,000 in shock and I didn't know what was going to happen to me in the next 10 seconds. So I just ran for my life onto the oval, back onto the oval. And I just kept running and I could just hear yelling. I could hear footsteps. I looked back and there were 10 became 15. They gathered all their friends. They're chasing me and I'm running out of breath. My heart's racing. And then I get tackled to the floor by one of them. And I,
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:29,000 At that point, I just cover my face and I just stay on the floor and I'm like, okay, whatever's going to happen is going to happen. Just pray that it doesn't end too badly because it's one of me and 15 of them. And, you know, they pretty much, they pounce on me, they dump buckets of water on me, throw the buckets on me, and pretty much pin to the floor. And...
00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:48,000 I got bruised up and everything. And I got up from there and I'm trying to hold my tears in because of the same people who have been at it for the last five years. And I looked at one of them, the person who taught, that tackled me, he wasn't even a part of the group. He just tagged along as a friend because he was a friend of the bullies.
00:14:48,000 --> 00:15:13,000 And I just asked him, why did you do that? And I remember at that point, it was just like, I didn't even have it in me to say anything more. So I walked back up and the school photographer actually to top it all off was at the top of the hill. And he took a photo of that scene where they're all laughing at me and pointing at me because he didn't know who that we were not friends. So he took a photo of that scene of them laughing and pointing at me walking up and, you know, me pulling my pants up because that,
00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:39,000 My pants had been falling off as well. And he put that, that photo was put on the school newsletter. And then that was like, I walked up and I remember in the stairwell, I ran into those two friends just sobbing, never cried so much at school, somehow had to go up and change. And then everyone was, you know, having snacks in the room and somehow to wipe my tears. And that day I,
00:15:39,000 --> 00:16:00,000 was like, someone has to figure out about this. And I was always very hesitant to tell my parents. I never wanted anyone to find out about this. And I think that's just the nature of young men growing up. It's hard, obviously, but we know it's harder for young men to open up. But I was always, like I said, I was expressive and I loved telling stories.
00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:24,000 But for some reason, this idea of friends was so close to my heart. Like I always wanted to be included, always wanted to be part of a friend group. And not having that was the one thing which I didn't want anyone to know. Didn't want my mom to know. Didn't want my dad to know. Didn't want anyone to know. Went home, got on the bus, got on the train just by myself, still in shock, don't understand what's just happened. Never experienced anything like that before.
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:48,000 Got on the bus home and I was sitting in, you know, in the bus, you've got the three seats at the front for the disabled seats. I was sitting and there was another lady sitting next to me and I just broke down in tears. And the lady broke down in tears, but still I was trying to cover my face up like this so no one could tell. And the lady sitting opposite me, sorry, she was just intrigued. She was like, is this guy crying or is he laughing? I just got no idea.
00:16:48,000 --> 00:17:18,000 And I lifted up my face for one second and she could see all the tears. And then she took me to the side. She was like, hey, what's going on? And she was like, no, you're going to tell me what's going on. And I told her everything. And she's like, I'm a teacher at a school nearby. She happened to be a teacher as well. And she was telling me all the different courses of action I could take, all the different things that she's seen this play out in the past and what the serious consequences would be to my mental health if I didn't open up. And it was, I would say,
00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:39,000 That played a major factor in that same day. Somehow, still after that, didn't open up to my mom on the bar stool, but she knows me so well. She came down, had a look at my face. She said, what's wrong? As soon as he said, what's wrong? I just burst out in tears. After that, she called the principal. And the issue was we finished our enrollment in school the day after because I was the first day of HSC.
00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:55,000 And what the principal made them do was to get me in a room and get all of those 15 people to come in one by one and face me and apologize. And I was like, I don't want to ever see them again. Forget about the apology. I just don't want to see their faces again. But that happened. And...
00:17:55,000 --> 00:18:17,000 I saw the counselor for the first time, and again, I was against that whole idea. Young boy, didn't want to be different from the rest. I just wanted to be like every other school student. I wanted the normal experience, which I didn't get. That pissed me off more than anything. And one of the two friends I mentioned to you earlier from that new group, one of those two friends,
00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:38,000 After the HSC, one of them, he passed away because he had a heart condition. So he passed away at 17 years old. And then I was left with this one friend. And I was so lost, so lost. Like we went to a family trip to New Zealand. Universities were calling me because they were wondering whether I wanted to accept the offers or not.
00:18:38,000 --> 00:19:01,000 Luckily, the HSC went well. I got a great mark. I got exactly the marks I needed to get into the degree I wanted to study. But I didn't even have the need, the willpower to pick up the phone from universities. I didn't I didn't know what to do. So you went through this oppression at school and obviously that had you keeping things to yourself largely, aside from all the normal things.
00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:24,000 masculine growing up aspects. So that's playing out for you by the sound of it. And then you've got this terrible event where in one day you've gone from this height of fun, water fights and slides and things like that, to then really copying physical and mental and verbal abuse.
00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:36,000 And then within, what, 48 hours, you've had to front up and meet the oppressors, if you want. They've bullied you. That's...
00:19:36,000 --> 00:20:02,000 That's pretty rapid fire for anyone stepping into your HSC, but you still went well in your HSC and got through that. Somehow, I think it's just the nature of having worked for it for the last two years that there's no other option but to get what you planned on getting done. I would have felt if that event would have had a detrimental impact on my HSC. I think I just became so numb to it.
00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:30,000 So numb to it. So bad. This sounds so awkward, but I think the years of verbal abuse before that almost somehow built a mini shield of armor where that physical event didn't do as much damage to me as it would have if I had, I had not experienced what I did for the life from years nine, eight to like 10, eight to 11. It sounds like you're very determined with your study as well. You're a very focused, determined student. It sounds like.
00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:53,000 Yeah. Yeah. I was like, I, I, you know, I wanted to study law and I just, I knew that the studying law degrees takes quite a bit of effort and a high mark. And so I ended up pursuing a journalism and law degree. I'm doing that right now at UTS. And before that though, I really, really was hell bent on taking a gap year. No matter what happened, I was like,
00:20:53,000 --> 00:21:13,000 Doesn't matter if I get a great mark. Doesn't matter if I want to. I just need the year off school. I need to forget about everything that's happened and restart, reset some way. I thought the only way I would do that was through a gap year. And I thought that the gap year was a perfect way. I'd get my mind off it. And I was like, well, I don't want to sit at home and do a gap year. I want to do something. And one day I was scrolling through social media and I saw the Navy.
00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:37,000 The ADF gap year program, they pay 60 grand, they sponsor your travel, you get trained, you get disciplined, brand new bunch of friends who, you know, you form great bonds with and they don't know about your past, no preconceived notions. And I was like, this is it. I'm joining the Navy, no matter what, no one's going to stop me. I started my Navy application one year, just the one year program, right? Just the gap year. Then I went to university, I was fine. Just the one year Navy. And...
00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:52,000 I can't believe this happened. I was like, no one's going to stop me. I'm joining the Navy. I just want to leave this place, get out of Sydney, travel Australia for a bit on a ship and off a ship and just come back with a completely reset mind.
00:21:53,000 --> 00:22:13,000 One of the tests to do the Navy is called a spirometry, where you've got to do a lung capacity test and you've got to blow into a tube and see how far you can blow a pin. I was 1% off that when I did the test. And because the intake and the demand was so high, because I was 1% off that, the time it took me to rebook was four months.
00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:34,000 In that four months, it was too late. I had to make a decision. Do I either on census date, which is when the HECS fees go through for university, do I enroll in university, maybe do the Navy the year after, or do I just take the risk and hope that they get back to me and maybe find a job for the first half of the year and then join the Navy and then defer university? I was like, you know what?
00:22:34,000 --> 00:22:51,000 screw the risk, pissed off, walked into my first journalism and law class. And I think that's the best thing that's happened to me. I walked into journalism, my first journalism class. I found the people who were just like me back when I was in year six, that same level of, of, of, of,
00:22:51,000 --> 00:23:19,000 of emotion and energy within them. And I think what the biggest thing was all that bottled up idea on all that bottled up stories I wanted to share absolutely exploded through two main avenues and which was speaking public speaking and writing. And the journalism law combo works so well because I could finally, finally feel like I could give, tell people what I wanted to tell during high school, but I couldn't because they had those impressions. I could make first impressions for the first time.
00:23:19,000 --> 00:23:47,000 I was making friends left, right, and center. This was the best thing. Started performing as well because I'm a part-time magician. So Friday nights, Saturday nights, I was performing, loving it fully in my element. And it was like, it just felt like I was uncaged for the first time. And from then onwards, I don't know if you've heard of the charity, Are You Okay? I became an ambassador for them, shared my story on national television. Headspace, another youth mental health charity, became a youth advisor for them. And I think if it wasn't for that,
00:23:47,000 --> 00:24:02,000 for those six years though, as terrible as it sounds, I wouldn't have had the desire I do now to chase whatever dreams I have. You're right. So you're living a liberated life by the sound of it.
00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:24,000 That's great. It's great. I mean, of course, there are ups and downs. There are still moments where it's like, it's difficult. People, problems come and go, but nothing, not at all to the extent at which what happened in high school. And now that they come, it's almost like I see the same problem being come across some of my friends and they're treating it as if it's an end it all or be it or be all or end all of something. I'm just like, this is...
00:24:24,000 --> 00:24:50,000 mate, you should have, this is like, this is the, I've been trained for this kind of thing. And this is like just the day in the, so it's really good. I think the exposure, which I got, you know, what I can now block out and what I can compartmentalize in my head. I think that ability transferred really well to compartmentalize the study and the exam from everything else that was going on with the bullies has carried on to my professional and personal life now. Like when I compartmentalize between, you know,
00:24:50,000 --> 00:25:19,000 applying a legal mind to legal concepts and writing completely different way to when you're writing an article for a newspaper, right? You've got to kill the life in one side, write much more formally in the other. So I think, yeah, it's been a very formative experience. I wouldn't wish it upon anyone, but I think what it's built me and the grit it's embedded in me has been quite remarkable. Did you feel, just going back into that school time briefly,
00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:40,000 You're talking now about this dichotomy. So was there a dichotomy going on for you at school that there was all your study and desires, yet all this oppression going on? Do you relate it to why you've now gone into law, why you've gone into journalism? There's a double degree you're doing by the sound of it.
00:25:40,000 --> 00:26:01,000 That's right. It's a double degree. It's five years. I always wanted to... I was addicted to crime as a kid. I loved RBT, loved NCIS. So I was like, you know what? The closest I can get to is the law because criminology doesn't really let me practice in the criminal law. Won't let me be a detective. So I was like, law and forensic science sounds cool. But then I...
00:26:01,000 --> 00:26:30,000 Had a small time dream back in high school where I wanted to be on camera, just do something on camera. And I was like, you know what? To somehow keep that dream alive, let's just add journalism to the mix. We'll keep the law. When uni started, the whole equation flipped. Now it's like I work at Nine News. I work in the media. I have completely... The law is the backup plan. Like the law is beneath everything else and the media is up front. The journalism is up front. I'm writing every day. So I think that small...
00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:38,000 I'm so glad that small fire remained a light in my stomach because none of this would have happened. But that dichotomy, like you mentioned,
00:26:39,000 --> 00:27:07,000 It did not come from the experience. It came from me just loving crime as a kid and just loving RBT and loving the... I just loved this idea of solving crime and why criminals commit crime. And that's what first birthed my interest in the law. It was always criminal law. And even when I studied criminal law earlier this year, it was my favorite subject by far, my best performing subject.
00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:13,000 But the only thing that I like more than that now, and I know that my personality and my skills are more aligned to, is the world of journalism.
00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:41,000 Is it the investigating injustice or is it being on the camera? Right now, it's a bit of everything. I think you're right. You can definitely intersect crime reporting very well, court reporting as well. Investigative journalism is huge. It's so cool. And, you know, Four Corners. Are you kidding me? All that 60 minutes of current affair? Definitely on the cards. But I think I'm loving the entertainment side of journalism as well quite a bit. I'm loving...
00:27:41,000 --> 00:28:05,000 what breaking news can offer me, sports journalism can offer me, entertainment journalism can offer me, crime, just crime reporting. I think I'm so fresh to it. I haven't really eliminated anything aside from political reporting. I'm not going to go into that. I don't know. I just never, never had a desire to go into politics reporting. But yeah, I'm just in awe at what it can offer me because I felt like
00:28:06,000 --> 00:28:27,000 I had all of this performance ability in me in school, but because of... I never felt safe to express it because every time I felt like I was about to express it, it would get shut down. What's the point of even expressing it? So those years went by of me just holding it in myself, holding it in myself, holding it in myself. And it got to the point where I started first year uni. I was just like, everything came out at once. And it just so nicely...
00:28:27,000 --> 00:28:54,000 distilled and fit into the route that journalism has to offer, where you need to bring out that performance ability, either within your writing, within your speaking, if you're going to go into radio, or whether on camera, if you're going to go into broadcast. So your expression and curiosity are being given a day in the sun, to say the least. Yeah, so to speak. Right, right. And how are you going with friends at university?
00:28:54,000 --> 00:29:21,000 It's interesting. Again, I didn't mention this earlier on, but all I really wanted to do when I left primary school, enjoyed high school, was to make a new bunch of friends. It was always the constant threat. I just loved being... Just find myself at home when I'm with a close bunch of friends. I can't... I'm much rather... Like, the solo travelling idea, it irks me out. I know I need to do it, leave my comfort zone. I've done it domestically, never solo travelled internationally. But I am... I can...
00:29:21,000 --> 00:29:32,000 I feel like I work and interact the best when I'm with people that I just enjoy the company. Like I've just always been a people person just since a kid. And yeah,
00:29:32,000 --> 00:29:57,000 So when I started university, I just went just like any person that I saw in class, whatever, started a conversation, great friends, started going out for dinner. I was like, wow. So this is what it felt like for all the year 11, 12 kids would go out for lunch after exams and I would go home and I don't know, take a power nap or something. So it felt really good. And I was like, Oh, I need to bathe in this for a bit because I missed, I felt like I missed out on this during school. And yeah,
00:29:57,000 --> 00:30:15,000 But like life happens and people start to realize that because my degree is five years and theirs is two, three, sorry. A lot of other people's is three, four. I, you know, friends come and go. Some friends who I was very close with, I still maintain, keep in touch with them. And I, I,
00:30:15,000 --> 00:30:40,000 I see them every now and then, but they're not as close as they used to be. So then I still felt there was this missing element of a constant group of friends, like someone close I could always fall back upon. And I think it came with the nature of me doing so much on the career side, whereas a lot of other of the people I met at university were so attracted to the social side and the drinking culture and the partying culture. So I don't really drink that much.
00:30:40,000 --> 00:31:05,000 at all with my friends and I couldn't relate there. So I, there was still great friends. I still keep in touch, but they come and go. So then we've got this amazing, so I got a UTS and we've got this amazing society called the big lift where we embark on a nine day road trip for with 80 people, two buses to regional towns across Australia. I don't know if you've heard of a true Victorian border, uh,
00:31:05,000 --> 00:31:20,000 towns across the New South Wales. So we take a big trip and we go nine days, volunteer across these regional towns, end in Melbourne, have a night in Melbourne, come back, stop at Wagga Wagga on the way and come back. I was like, all I've heard is good things.
00:31:20,000 --> 00:31:44,000 Do I want to spend nine days with minimal sleep helping clean up trees in regional towns? Oh, I don't know. Probably not. Then the next day, I found out about this. I will go to work. Turns out a colleague at work is part of the organizing committee for this trip. And she says, oh, have you heard of the trip? I was like, yeah, I saw it yesterday. I don't know. It's in the uni break.
00:31:44,000 --> 00:32:00,000 Nine days, 80 strangers. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I just didn't know. And she's like, the application's closed today. And she, I kid you not, Mark, she didn't let me leave until she'd convinced me that I had signed up in front of her and go.
00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:23,000 Because I told her the whole thing about, because she, you know, we went into a bit of a more deeper chat about friends and social life. And she's like, just listen to me. I was in the exact same position as you were last year. Mahir, I swear to God, if you don't go on this trip and you're going to regret it, don't come running after me saying you wish you would have come. Seeing all the photos and all the marketing material that emerged next year. I was like, you know what?
00:32:23,000 --> 00:32:45,000 That's it. I'm going. Pack my bags. I had never gone on a trip without family outside of Sydney before. It's always been with family, right? So this was the first time. Pack my bags. Arguably the best... Yeah, definitely. The best nine days of the year was that trip where we'd go to rural communities...
00:32:45,000 --> 00:33:11,000 8 a.m. to 12 p.m., we'd go into a clean the gutters of someone's house. Populations of 300 to 500 people. And, you know, by lunchtime, they'd feed us. They'd give us lunch. Two buses. One bus went this way. One bus went the other way. We'd meet in Melbourne. 40 people on a bus. Never met them before. I have never got closer to a bunch of friends as I have before. We slept on church halls, floors, primary school libraries with the lights on throughout the night, sleeping mats and sleeping bags.
00:33:11,000 --> 00:33:24,000 The locals would take us to the pub every night and show us around, talk to us about the history of the village. It was the complete opposite of what I'd expected to experience. And now my closest friends,
00:33:25,000 --> 00:33:50,000 by far other people from that trip, because we put all our differences aside when it came to, you know, you're on three hours of sleep, you've got to help each other out. It doesn't matter where in their career they are. It doesn't matter what they've been through high school. It doesn't matter if they've been bullied or not. It doesn't matter what the color of their skin is. We've got so close just by the nature of volunteering. And that's what Ian stands for, right? Volunteering and the nature of volunteering.
00:33:50,000 --> 00:34:19,000 giving back and serving when all the rest of the year, it's hard to serve community that I just, I was mind blown because everyone said it's going to be a life-changing experience. It's going to be life-changing. I was like, no, it can't be life-changing. I haven't heard of it before. And somehow it was like, it just, I don't know how. And, you know, I catch up with them every few weeks. I'll be going on a trip to Coffs Harbor in a few weeks with a bunch of them. And that's, that's what the friends situation looks like in university now.
00:34:19,000 --> 00:34:42,000 Oh, good. So it sounds like a couple of different groups and a bit of diversity. Yeah, completely different. Yeah. Right, right. Do you think in the fact you're doing not just the volunteering, but the lack of sleep, the sleeping on the floors and all going through a bit of discomfort, a bit of adversity, but it adds to some sort of bonding?
00:34:43,000 --> 00:34:59,000 Yeah. Yeah. I don't know the name of it, but I know there's a name to describe this. People say trauma bonding. There was no trauma involved aside from the sleep. Yes. That was traumatic because I'm someone who loves my eight hours of sleep, but the, the, yeah, I do think that when it comes to the point where like, you know,
00:34:59,000 --> 00:35:25,000 I don't care how I look. I don't care if I brush my teeth or not, but we're all going through it. And, and you want a glass of water. Here's a glass of water. Let's just help each other out. Then once you break that, you go so deep to bedrock in a friendship, you break all the surface layers and you finally find out that in a time of need that these people are always there to help. When we get out of that experience, like I could be stranded in a random suburb in Sydney. And I know that if one of those big lift friends are there,
00:35:25,000 --> 00:35:50,000 They'd be more than happy. They'd ask me, come and sleep over at mine. So, and I think that's, it's funny. It's so weird how you can connect the dots looking back. That's what I was looking for, hopefully, to get out of the Navy when I left school, that experience. And that level of bond, right? That like hardcore 6am, get up, train, work the whole day, come home, sleep. You've got to fold your clothes in a certain way, but everyone's got to do it. Everyone's bonded by it.
00:35:50,000 --> 00:36:10,000 That's what I was looking for in the Navy. And the fact that I got it somehow in university has almost closed the loop for me. And now I know that things are working out. The Navy got back to me, ended up getting back to me in September of last year. So, so late. I'm so glad I started university. But I've always got their offer in hand. Maybe after uni, I want a year off. I can still do the year with the Navy anytime. But I...
00:36:10,000 --> 00:36:26,000 It felt very satisfying because for the first time I finally felt that I found my people because I've lost touch with the people from primary school as well. I've lost touch. I don't keep in touch with a single person in high school, not a single person. You haven't kept in touch with the one buddy you had? No.
00:36:26,000 --> 00:36:54,000 No, I grew apart with him as well, grew apart with him as well. So for the first time, I finally felt that I've got a friend like family, like I finally found that inclusivity, which I was looking for. And, and it was, it was very, very fulfilling. I think I, by the end of the nine days, I was in tears that I couldn't believe I found these people that I was in search for, for since the start of high school. And I,
00:36:55,000 --> 00:37:24,000 Yeah. I hope to keep in touch with these people for as long as I can. And I, if anyone who's listening and goes to UTS and you're considering going to the big lift, yes, please do. But otherwise, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So a bit, a bit of adversity in, in the, in the big lift. And it, it also adds another, another dimension to friendships, which is interesting, interesting thing for you to, you to find. So that's such a, such a stage.
00:37:25,000 --> 00:37:48,000 And what do you think going forward? So you'll be in journalism, and there's obviously many different areas to go in there. So things like that. But you're probably also going to find some tough stories in there. Does that excite you? Do you want to look forward to it with curiosity? Or where's that sitting with you now? Still exploring, maybe?
00:37:49,000 --> 00:38:17,000 Yeah. Yeah. Just exploring my curiosity. I'm just trying to have an impact on as many younger students who come up through the school system and now also into journalism. So we've got like at UTS, it's an amazing journalism school, oldest journalism school in the country, if I'm not wrong. And we've got a student newsroom. So I've been involved in mentoring the up and coming writers and looking at other people's stories and, and, and,
00:38:17,000 --> 00:38:37,000 just people who other people who have lost in their careers and what helped me simply just what helped me through my lived experience and just passing, passing that on. But in terms of my own career, yeah, I will just looking to, to get into broadcast. That's it. Just, just working TV. That's the, that's the big kind of sector I would love to go into. And yeah,
00:38:37,000 --> 00:39:04,000 Right now, it's just wherever and whenever I can put my skills to use, whether that be in a media context, whether that be in a legal context, for example, whether that mean me facilitating a workshop for a bunch of year 11s and year 12s who come into learning about law at UTS. That's still me talking to 30 to 40 to 50 hundred people at once and developing and continually sharpening my public speaking skills, whether it be in a media context or not. So I think.
00:39:04,000 --> 00:39:28,000 Yeah, I'm chasing curiosity, chasing impact, but there's no hell-bent I want to report on just sport. Yes, please, if I get an opportunity to be on the desk at the Ashes, I will take it. But otherwise, yeah, nothing set in stone. The entertainment sphere appeals to me because I know that
00:39:28,000 --> 00:39:54,000 It's just I like to do some of the things that are offered in that realm of the media. So I think together with my skills and my traits, I think wherever the broadcast media world takes me, I'll just follow that path. And in terms of entertainment, Mahir, you said you do some magic tricks. Did you bring them along by any chance? Well, I can show you something funny. You have a look at this pen.
00:39:54,000 --> 00:40:23,000 Right? Yeah. And, and it's, it's, it's, it's normal pen clicks on and off. It's actually funny. It's, it's a law society of New South Wales. I don't know if you can see that, but, but, but it's, it's not no gimmick pen, but if I cover it and, and take it with me here, it just disappears. And it's not in my sleeves either. Wonderful.
00:40:24,000 --> 00:40:51,000 Wonderful. Thanks for sharing that. No worries. It's coming back out of my ear. There we go. Oh, whoa. You mentioned that you've done some presentations for, I think, Headspace and a bit of work around that area too. Do you have any particular summary message? I mean, you've expressed a lot now. Do you have any summary message for someone who's
00:40:52,000 --> 00:40:59,000 might be going through with that tough time, or maybe even a parent who hits on this and thinks, my child, am I listening to them right?
00:41:00,000 --> 00:41:29,000 Yeah, I do. I do. I do. This message purely comes from what I've managed to, how I've managed to bridge my adversity into what I'm doing now. And look, purely from hindsight, like this message comes nothing except from hindsight and looking back from a bird's eye view, connecting the dots and what worked and what didn't. And I think
00:41:29,000 --> 00:41:39,000 The biggest takeaway or the most impact that had on me when trying to get through adversity was...
00:41:39,000 --> 00:42:06,000 through my voice, I think the longer I stayed silent for and the less and less I shared, it had an indirect relationship. So it had a, the less and less I shared, the worse and worse I felt. So the less and less I spoke, whether it be even just to myself or writing in a diary or just recording something in my phone's voice memo or speaking to my sister, whatever it was, even if it wasn't about the adversity, just the less and less I used my voice,
00:42:06,000 --> 00:42:29,000 the more and more I felt hurt when I was in that time of adversity. And still now, right? So if I were to say one thing to a parent, to a kid who's listening, to anybody, if you are in the middle of a bit of an issue with people or friends or whatever it is, school, beyond school, I'd say that use your voice, but...
00:42:29,000 --> 00:42:59,000 Use it not to drown the voices of others, but to uplift the voices of others. I think what I found was a lot of the times in high school, the voices of others drowned mine out. And I was looking for the one voice who could uplift mine and stand up for me. And for me, it turned out to be myself because I had no one that would stand up in my way and be like, hey, what you're saying to me here isn't quite right. You shouldn't be speaking to him like that. So I had to do that myself.
00:42:59,000 --> 00:43:03,000 And I think if you can do that for someone else,
00:43:04,000 --> 00:43:30,000 then you're just avoiding a whole nother case of bullying, which isn't necessarily eradicated, not at all eradicated in Australia. You see it every now and then in the news, how worse the bullying statistics are getting and how much harder Australians are finding it to open up about it because of, you know, they're scared of judgment, they're scared of privacy. So I think if you can eliminate that completely by using your voice to uplift the
00:43:30,000 --> 00:43:38,000 rather than drown, I think that can make the biggest difference to someone else's life and yours too because you believe the next thing you know they'll do the same for you.
00:43:38,000 --> 00:44:06,000 Well, Mahir, I would like to thank you for being part of Heroes today. I feel a bit of an uplift having a special time with you. So thanks for sharing. And I think many of the viewers would also be grateful that you've had the courage to come on here and share your journey so far. Look forward to seeing you in the public media in the future. I'm sure it will be a delight.
00:44:06,000 --> 00:44:35,000 Well, thank you so much, Mark. You've really made this comfortable for me and I hope this episode goes well. Yeah. I'm sure it will. So to all the viewers out there, I hope you've enjoyed this time with Mahir, hearing his journey and get some level of inspiration, hope, joy, or hearing the story that you need to hear at the right time. Thanks, Mahir. Thanks so much, Mark. Cheers.
00:44:46,000 --> 00:45:09,000 Thank you for listening to this episode of Kintsugi Heroes. Thank you to Colin Lilly for permission to use Broken as our theme music for this series. If you enjoyed this conversation, share the podcast with a friend and let us know by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts.
00:45:09,000 --> 00:45:22,000 If you'd like to support Kintsugi Heroes and the stories we share, head to kintsugiheroes.com.au and follow the instructions to make a tax-deductible donation. Thank you for listening, and we'll see you next time.
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