Shanice Green · 62 min
Born into a body that fought her at every turn, Shanice Green survived nineteen surgeries, paralysis, and chronic pain to become a wheelchair-using empowerment coach who transforms the lives of women just like her.
Hear this story
Shanice Green was born into a body that required immediate intervention. Her first months brought a bowel condition doctors dismissed until her father forced them to take action. At six, a nurse spotted a spinal curvature no one else had noticed during a routine hospital discharge. Brain surgery followed at Great Ormond Street Hospital to unblock fluid trapped around her spinal cord, surgery her parents were told was necessary to keep her alive.
At ten, after what was supposed to be routine surgery, Shanice woke paralyzed from the neck down with no warning. She had to learn to move, eat, and sit up all over again in a crowded rehabilitation ward two hours from her family, growing up mentally and emotionally at a speed no child should have to. She survived nineteen surgeries, chronic pain every single day, and a surgeon's words at nineteen that there was only one more operation possible for her. That moment lit a fire inside her. She had to ensure her children would be financially stable, because she did not know if she would wake up the next day.
When a woman she knew reached out, too self-conscious to use a wheelchair in public, Shanice offered to coach her for free for a month. Within four weeks, that woman sent her a photo out with her family, using her wheelchair without shame. That was when Shanice knew this was her calling. Now a wheelchair-using empowerment coach, she works with clients by going with the flow, with no scripts, believing what needs to come up will come up that day. Her message to anyone listening: you are perfectly yourself just the way you are. Nobody can do you better than you.
“this is it this is why I was put on this Earth I truly believe that we are all put this air for a reason and that was my reason that was my call-in”
“I wouldn't have been able to get through going through depression and not really wanting to be here in a sense but I was like you're selfish if you want to leave this earth and leave everyone behind”
“I'm in pain 24 7 but if my mum sends me since you're actually smiling I knew you were smiling anyway but actually from the core I can smile from the core I know I'm happy”
The hero, today
Shanice was told by a surgeon at nineteen that there was only one more operation possible for her conditions, and that moment lit a fire inside her to make sure her children would be financially stable, because she did not know if she would wake up the next day. When Shanice coached a client for free for a month, the woman went from being too self-conscious to use a wheelchair in public to sending her a photo out with her children and husband in her wheelchair, and that was when Shanice knew this was her calling. Shanice's children have made her stay alive through the worst of her chronic pain, because they need her, and she will not leave them; becoming a mother changed the whole trajectory of her life. Shanice's support system, her mum, her grandad, and later her children, is what has pulled her through every surgery, every hospital stay, and every day of pain, and she knows she is lucky because many people do not have what she has. Shanice does not script her coaching sessions or plan what she will work on; she goes with the flow because she believes what needs to come up will come up that day, and this way of working has changed her clients' lives. Nobody is perfect, but you are perfectly yourself just the way you are, and if you are happy in yourself, that is all that matters.
Yes. Shanice Green is a real person who shared their own story in their own words. Kintsugi Heroes is a not-for-profit that shares first-person stories of overcoming adversity, told with the person's consent.
Kintsugi Heroes, a registered Australian not-for-profit. Every story is shared with the hero's own consent and reviewed under Kintsugi Heroes' trauma-informed content standard before it goes public.
Shanice was told by a surgeon at nineteen that there was only one more operation possible for her conditions, and that moment lit a fire inside her to make sure her children would be financially stable, because she did not know if she would wake up the next day.
When Shanice coached a client for free for a month, the woman went from being too self-conscious to use a wheelchair in public to sending her a photo out with her children and husband in her wheelchair, and that was when Shanice knew this was her calling.
Shanice's children have made her stay alive through the worst of her chronic pain, because they need her, and she will not leave them; becoming a mother changed the whole trajectory of her life.
Aveline Clark (Host) · 00:03
Welcome to the Kintsugi Heroes podcast, where we share inspirational stories of everyday people going through different challenges and how they overcome them. Please be aware that the story you're about to hear may have moments of deeply felt emotions and personal experiences. If anything you hear has a triggering effect, please reach out to someone who can help keep you safe. If you love this conversation, please like and share it with your friends so we can continue to share more inspiration and hope to as many people as possible. Now listen up for our next hero's story. And in this episode, I meet with Shanice Green. What an inspirational young woman she is. Single mother of two children, she's lived with pain her whole life Lives in a wheelchair. She's had 19 surgeries so far since childhood. It's a beautiful story. She talks about the journey through figuring out that she had a condition where she stopped being able to, you know, function like all her friends in school and the different events and periods spent in hospital as a child. And I love her warmth is just massive, her grace and her gratitude for life. It's really hard for someone who doesn't live in pain to understand what it's like for someone who does live in pain. She never complains and she does it all in a wheelchair. She now supports others and helps them to become better versions of themselves and overcome their limiting beliefs and, and those issues they may have as people in wheelchairs. She's truly a joy. She's inspirational. This one really touched me. Very, very deeply, and I think I might have even had a cry at the end. So I invite you to enjoy this one with Shanice Green. Here we are, it's Kintsugi Heroes, and my guest today is Shanice Green. How are you doing today, Shanice?
Shanice Green (Guest) · 02:13
I'm really good, thank you.
Aveline Clark (Host) · 02:16
Good to hear. And thank you for joining me here on Kintsugi Heroes. It's a pleasure to have you here.
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Shanice's support system, her mum, her grandad, and later her children, is what has pulled her through every surgery, every hospital stay, and every day of pain, and she knows she is lucky because many people do not have what she has.
This conversation includes born into a fight, the nurse who saw what was hidden, brain surgery at seven, the turning point no one saw coming, rehabilitation in a crowded ward and back to school in a wheelchair.
Shanice Green (Guest) · 02:25
Thank you for asking me to be on.
Aveline Clark (Host) · 02:27
You're welcome. And look, this is about your story. And I always want to honor and acknowledge the guests when they come in because I know that often our stories are not easy to talk about. Sometimes they're hard to go through. And yet they're your bravery is big because you've shown up to tell the story and you want to give something back to others. And so just up front, I want to thank you for that.
Shanice Green (Guest) · 02:53
Thank you very much.
Aveline Clark (Host) · 02:55
You're welcome. All right, so let's get started, shall we? How about you take me back? Where does your story begin? Start from the beginning and then take, take us through. Thank you.
Shanice Green (Guest) · 03:07
My story starts when I was born. So basically, my mum didn't have a great labor with me. She reminds me most times that I took 3 days to come, and she was in a lot of pain, and she had a lot of, like, she had failed forceps, failed ventouse. It just didn't go straight to plan, and I was her first child as well. So I'm very surprised that she ended up having more children afterwards because I may have put her off for life. And then I, because my mum had failed forceps, the forceps burnt my cheek and basically it rubbed on my cheek and it made it very, very sore. So there was a burn on my cheek and I've got a dent in my head and I was in special care for 3 to 6 days. 6 days I was in special care for. I came home, everything seemed fine, and then at the age of, I think, 6 months old, I developed a bowel condition. So I was under specialists, etc., and my parents noticed that I would go blue. So I would get mad and go blue and hold my breath. And every time I went to the doctors, they were like, well, it can't be happening because it's not happening right now, you know, you can't be telling the truth. And whether it was the right thing to do or not, but I am grateful that he did that. My parents took me to A&E, which is Accident and Emergency. And my dad pinched me just so I would hold my breath and go blue again. So they're like, "Okay, it's me." Yeah, so they all, you know, rushed around and, you know, to sort me out because they didn't believe it numerous times before. It's just a kind of running joke with my family now that my dad pinched me, you know. And from there, I was under specialist for my bowel condition. Fast forward to when I was 6 now. So I've already started school. I was quite a clumsy child, my mum said. So, you know, I would fall over thin air and I would always have bruises and cuts on me. That was just me. Actually, at the age of 5, My little sister was born as well. But it was just a typical life. I still had the bowel condition, still had issues with that, but I just lived my life normally. And then at the age of 6, I went into hospital for a washout for my bowel. So basically what that is, the tube up your nose, down your throat, and into your stomach. Just to clear you out, which doesn't sound great. And especially at the age of 6, like, I didn't know what was going on. My mum actually had to hold me down, like, pin me down on the bed for them to actually do it because I wasn't having any of it. So as you can imagine, as a parent, it must have been heartbreaking to know that you're distressing your child but you know it's for basically the greater good, do you know what I mean? It's for her best interest. So they did that. It was disgusting. They gave me some very nasty stuff to drink as well, and I still remember to this day what it tastes like. It's just— it wasn't good at all. So when I was ready to go home, for them to discharge me, a nurse, I believe, said to my mum, "Why is her head over to one side?" And my mum said, "Oh, I've always put it down to shyness." I was her first child. I was a pretty shy child anyway, even though I did get mad as a baby and then start going blue. But, you know, so then I— my mum said, "Yes, it's just down to shyness." And You need to remember, I was already under specialist. I was under specialist for my bowel. I was at school. No one ever asked, so clearly everything's fine then, right? The nurse asked, can I lift up the back of her top just to look at her back? Mum was like, it's absolutely fine. That was it. They lifted up the back of my top and noticed there was a curvature in my spine. From there, It just spiraled. It was like the first day of my life again. And it happened quite a few times throughout my life journey. But from there, I was referred to the most amazing, spectacular— I can't— the gratitude for that hospital was amazing. Great Ormond Street Children's Hospital. And it's just amazing, absolutely amazing. Children from all around the world go to this hospital. I was then diagnosed. I had like MRI scans, CT scans, X-rays, and I was diagnosed with neurological conditions. So I have— then I just had Arnold-Chiari malformation, syringomyelia, and scoliosis, which is the curvature. My parents were then told that if I did not have the first surgery, which is, which was at the base of my brain, which is called a decompression surgery, that I wouldn't be here. The fluid, basically the cerebral spinal fluid that goes around your nervous system, gets basically stuck. Unblocked. So mine goes from the base of my brain all the way down my spinal cord. And they said, if we didn't— if we don't get this flowing, I wouldn't be here today. Absolutely not. That must have been a lot for my parents to digest. I was only 7 then, and I don't remember much. I was just a child, and I believe that children are just so resilient and just go with the flow and just like, "Okay, it's fine." They don't realize that, you know, there is some mishaps that could happen and the complications that can happen from surgery. You know, and I look back now and I think my mum had to sign a piece of paper, a consent form, with all these complications on it. And one of them complications was death. Like, that must be a lot for a parent to be able to do. So at the age of 7, I had my first surgery, which was brain surgery, and that was it. That was it. And then every 6 to 8 months after that, I would go into hospital again for further surgery. My next one was on my spine, so I have a pleural shunt, which is like a plastic tube that goes from the middle of my spine and goes all the way around into my lungs to drain off the fluid. But children grow and it would get blocked, it would get dislodged, so I'd go back in again for them to take it out and put another one back in. I like to say that they whipped it out and whipped it back in, but I'm just very crude and just straight to the point. Actually, when I was 9, 8 or 9, because I was in and out of hospital, they noticed that when I was asleep, that the alarms would go off because I would stop breathing. So I had to have my tonsils and adenoids taken out. But because it's me and because I'm not straightforward, I end up having a blood clot. They had to go back in again. To take the blood clot out. So I was in hospital for a little bit longer, but it didn't actually solve it. I still stopped breathing. So actually I had 2 surgeries that wasn't actually needed in a sense because it didn't make a difference. I still stopped breathing in my sleep when I was 10. I had an MRI scan in August, I believe, It would have been just before I went on a family holiday, family vacation, um, in the UK. And we went there, everything was fine, had an amazing time, came home. Um, I think it probably went on a Friday. We would have come home on a Saturday, and there was an answer machine message on the landline phone, and it basically said, "Shanice needs to go in hospital for further surgery on the Tuesday." It was now beginning of September, coming up to the beginning of September, and I was due to go back to school after the break from the school holidays. My mum decided to send me to school on the Monday because she didn't want me to overthink. She just wanted everything to be normal. And my norm is actually going to school and then going into hospital, having surgery, coming home, recovering, and going back to school again. That's just— that was just my life. So I went to school on the Monday. I actually remember what I wore. I actually remember it was like a black, like, blazery type with, like, black skirt. And I was looking quite kind of good. We was allowed to wear our own clothes. In primary school, um, and I went there, came home. My mum, of course, in that time was like packing, etc., for us, and went to hospital on the Tuesday morning, um, and then that's where it all started again. And like I said, my— when I was 7, it was kind of like my whole life restarted. This one, it was— I didn't know what was coming and no one knew it was coming. It was just gonna go— I was just gonna go into hospital to have the surgery that I had when I was 7, just to the base of my brain. And what happened was I had 4 operations, 4 surgeries in 6 days. That's a lot on anyone's body anyway. I had a blood clot as well, so they had to take that out. So it was at the base of my brain as well. And I don't remember all this. I don't remember much of it at all, thankfully. I ended up paralyzed from my neck down. I'm not paralyzed anymore. Which is absolutely amazing. But I had to learn how to do everything all over again. I was then in a wheelchair, and I remember the wheelchair they gave me in hospital to use. It was absolutely horrible. You could feel every single bump. When someone pushed you, you could feel every single bump that was possibly there. You wouldn't even know a bump was there, but it was there. You could feel it. And I had to learn how to eat again, like feed myself, how to hold a pen, how to sit up again. I've learned everything from scratch. It's kind of like if you imagine you do that when you're a, like, baby, you know, the first toddler, and I've had to learn it all again. I have weakness down my left-hand side, so my left hand and arm wouldn't work as much anyway, so I just did everything with my right. And I remember when I first learned to sit up on my own and my mum cried like an absolute baby. It was— I remember that. That's one part I do remember. But it was very lonely. It was very lonely, you know. Thankfully, I had my mum with me. My dad and my granddad and my sister would come and see me every single Saturday, um, get on 3 buses to come to see me. My granddad had a walking stick, and yeah, he would make sure he would come and see me. He was in pain 24/7, but he still made sure he'd come see his baby. And that's what pushed me along, that I had something to look forward to at the weekend. I would see them, just be normal, you know, just get away from the reality that I was in at this present moment, you know. The nurses and the doctors were lovely, even down to the person that gave my food. His name was Wilson, and I still remember that. And he used to give me extra food because I think I was his favorite. And I was in that hospital for 3 months. And then they said, "There's still work for you to do, but we can't give it to you, so you need to go to a rehabilitation hospital." Also in this time, my house that I was living in wasn't accessible for me. So in that time, my mum had to make phone calls and go back to where we was living and arrange, find somewhere for me to live, basically. So in them 3 months, it was just crazy. And they said, we will not allow you to go home until we know this is where you're going to be, this is safe for you to live. So I went to the rehabilitation hospital, which was a about roughly about 2 hours away from where my family are, and it wasn't as easy to get to, so they couldn't come to see me. I was in this hospital for 2 months. Because it was over Christmas, they actually allowed me home for Christmas, which was amazing. I was allowed home because my— thankfully, a couple of weeks beforehand, my mum found us a place for us to live. And my mum, my dad, and my sister already moved in. It wasn't, of course, the most amazing Christmas because everything was still needed to be sorted in the house, and I've literally just come home out of hospital. I just want to rest. I just want to relax. I just want to have normal time. So Christmas wasn't amazing, but it was so good to be home, like, so good to be home. Listen to my sister's craziness, just the normal stuff, you know. And so I'm very, very grateful that they did this because that hospital was a completely different game to where I was before. When I was in Great Ormond Street Hospital, I had my own room, I had my own bathroom. It was just, it was just amazing. Whereas where I was then in the rehabilitation hospital, There was roughly probably about 12 to 16 beds all in one room. There was like maybe 2 feet between each bed. It wasn't— there wasn't much there, so it was kind of confined, you know, and I didn't know who anyone was. Thankfully, the— there was a girl that was in the bed next to me and she was lovely. We kind of got along really well, was the same age. I think there's literally like months between us, you know. But my mum couldn't stay with me in the actual room because of course there was no room. So she, um, they had like accommodation for parents, um, that was like on the campus but nowhere near me. So that was difficult for me as well. So not only did I not know where I was, I didn't really know the nurses, I didn't know anything really. And now my mum's not allowed to stay in the same room as me, so she'll stay until a certain time before— while I settle before bed and then go and come back in the morning. And every day I would have occupational therapy and physiotherapy. It was literally only, what, 1 hour each? So between them, there was nothing to do throughout the day. And they did have schooling at that hospital. It wasn't as good as the previous hospital at all. And it was— I grew up a lot there, you know. I felt that in them 2 months, as much as I've— from the age of, say, 6, 7, I had to grow up rapidly. This was a whole different thing. I just kind of like— I went from at 6 and 7, I had to grow up to maybe teenage years. Mentally. But when I went to the rehabilitation hospital, it's like I had to be an adult. I had to do everything. I had to grow up very, very quickly in that time. And then thankfully, they got me to a stage where I was allowed to go home. So I could stand holding bars, and I was trying to take steps. And then I went home, which was amazing. The 28th of January. I remember that date all the time. It was just amazing. I didn't get home until late, actually, because the ambulance service couldn't find my home. It was just a little bit of a— fun. And then in March, I went back to school. However, they— it wasn't accessible for me, so I had to work my backside off, basically, because they had stairs and I had to get up them stairs. I was on the top floor because I was like the last year of like school, that school. And my mum had to every day try and walk up the stairs, and I used to stay up there. Everyone else used to go out to play or in the playground. They used to go down for dinners, and I couldn't. I had— I was just stuck on the top floor until the end of the day, and then my mum could come and get me and walk me back down. But it was nice to have that normality. You know, thankfully I did pass school. I got through it. The only thing I didn't do, and I actually remember this, was my science because I had hospital that day, so I didn't actually have an exam or test on science. I remember that was the Monday. Quite crazy what you remember after, like, all this time. And then I went to secondary school, which we call secondary school, I think you call it high school, and I was still in a wheelchair, but there wasn't many people from my old school that were there, so they knew that, oh, they knew the real Sinead. They knew the real Sinead. They knew who she was. They knew how crazy she was, and just, you know, I was just just their friend, you know. But going to a new school meant that children weren't sure if to approach me or not because, oh my goodness, she's in a wheelchair, so clearly I don't know how to approach her. And that was difficult. I remember my first day, um, it's like a taste the day, and there was this girl who said to me— they were doing like PE, like sports and stuff like that, and gymnastics. And I was just sat there watching, and she said to me, "I feel really sorry for you." And I'm like, "Why?" She said, "Because you're in a wheelchair." And I was like, "Okay, um, I don't know how to take this, and I don't want to be rude." However, back then, my God, I didn't really think how I think now. Of she didn't know how to approach me, and she hasn't maybe seen someone that's in a wheelchair before and looks in a different light than I do. So then I was a little bit defensive, but I was just like, "Oh, okay, well, I'm fine, you know. I've still got a mouth. I can still talk. The only thing is I can't do the sports that you're doing right now, and actually that's using energy, and I don't want to use energy." So I did that. It was a time of my life that was kind of normal in a sense because I didn't go into hospital for surgery. I did have a couple of surgeries, but they were just on my feet. I didn't have no major surgeries. I just had days off of school because of pain, because I'm in pain 24/7. Or muscle spasms, and it used to just take it out of me. I remember me and my mum used to time them. So when a muscle spasm happens, the muscle contracts. And one of the spasms that I used to have was where my shoulder used to go up to basically my head, and it used to stay there. It didn't move. There was no way my mum couldn't push it down. And my record was 4 and a half hours. F. It kind of sounds silly now thinking about it, but it was just to get us through, you know, this rubbish time because it was hurting me, and what else are you going to do, you know? And then when I was— I got through school, I then went to sixth form, which is basically like further education, um, like college, etc. And that— we finished— even in the UK, we finished school at 16. Um, and then I went there, and then I was doing Level 3 in Health and Social Care. I did my Level 2 in Health and Social Care, um, at the end of high school, and then I was doing my Level 3 in Health and Social Care because I knew that I wanted to help people. I love that. Like, from a young age, I wanted to be a nurse, a children's nurse actually, and actually at Great Ormond Street Hospital because, you know. And then I realized once I got into a wheelchair, that can't happen. And then I decided to be a doc. I thought maybe I'll be a doctor. And it just kept on changing, but it was always to help.
Aveline Clark (Host) · 27:11
People.
Shanice Green (Guest) · 27:11
And then I was doing the Health and Social Care Level 3. I was only there for a couple of months, then I had to go in for surgery again, um, because the shunt, the plastic tube, basically dislodged. It moved that much that it was embedded in my spinal cord. I don't know how it did it, but it was embedded. With scar tissue around it. I don't know how I actually, you know, carried on. But if I go back a little bit, when I was 15, I started walking in a frame, which meant that maybe people looked at me a little bit differently. You know, they wasn't looking down at me. I was— I am kind of a short person anyway, but they wasn't looking completely down at me, and they didn't notice it. So I would sit in a normal chair and they wouldn't realize until I stood up, "Oh, there is actually something wrong with her." So, you know, the way that people would interact with me would be completely different to how they interacted with me when I was previously in a wheelchair. So I went in for surgery, came out of surgery, recovered, but it took a bit of time. So by the time I went back to education, the teachers, one of the teachers wasn't great and she refused to mark my work. So I decided, I'm doing work and you're not doing, you're not doing what you need to do, so I'm not going to get further along. So I dropped out. I regret that, but everything happens for a reason. And then at the age of 17, I met my children's biological father. My mum and my dad were going through a breakup, and I had to get away. I felt like I had to get away, so I moved with him. He did lie about his age, and there was things that I know that if my mum and dad weren't going through a breakup, we wouldn't have been together because it wasn't correct. It wasn't right. But I thought I had to get away. And then at the age of 18, I fell pregnant with my first child. And I always knew I wanted to be a mum. Like, my mum even said to me, I didn't think that you would ever meet anyone, ever have children. I thought you'd be with me forever, and I was really, really worried about your future. Now she could say that to me, but of course she couldn't say that to me before. And so I had my first child, my little girl, at the age of 18 in the September. And then in the November, we lost my granddad. And that was another turning point in my life. Previously to that, maybe a year or two before that, my mum said to me, We were driving, she said randomly, "When Grandad goes, don't leave me." And I said, "I can't promise you that," because he was my absolute hero and he helped push me along. And as much as I had the rest of my family, I didn't know I could cope without my granddad. So I truly believe he waited until my little girl was born. It was hard and it was tough and When he— the day he passed away, I couldn't even hold my own baby. I didn't know what to do. It was just quite a whirlwind craziness time. And then I decided to get through it, which wasn't the best thing to do. I look back here and I think, why did you do that? I just said, I know, let's get married. Okay, I was gonna marry the guy that lied about his age. That also hit me a few times, but I thought that was right for me to do, just for the grieving process, I think, just to have me something to focus on. Then in the— so I lost my gran in November, and then in the April we were supposed to get married. I went for surgery in February. It was very crazy, very, very crazy. Got married, got all that done. Don't really remember the day, but there you go. And then I was told by the surgeon that there's not much else they can do for me. That was the day that I knew something had to change. I felt this I don't even know, like rockets up my backside, fire inside me, and it was a lot for my family to take. And I was just like, something, I need to do something, I need to do something. In 2014, I had my son. The pregnancy was absolutely horrible. They wanted to operate on me during pregnancy. I thought I was going to lose him a few times. I had like a 2-week period where I couldn't eat at all. I found out I had another neurological condition and I couldn't actually swallow. It was a very hard time in my life. When I was told that, I was just like, okay, my plan, okay, I already know that my neurological conditions, I could not wake up the next day. Now this is getting deeper, so I need to make sure my children are financially stable when I do go. That was just my aim. That's just— that was just my aim. That's what I had to do. I felt inside of me, anything else that happens, great, but that's all. I didn't see my future. I didn't see my future. I just knew I had to do something. Sorry for the interruption. This is Ian Westmoreland, the founder of Katsuki Heroes, and thank you for listening to this story from one of our amazing heroes. Our mission is for these stories to provide hope and inspiration to people experiencing life challenges and to also educate the broader community on how best to provide support. If you would like to help us to continue to produce more hero stories and cover more adversity themes, we would welcome all donations. These can be made via our website kitsukiheroes.com.au. The donate function is at the bottom of the homepage. We'd also welcome any feedback. You can email me direct using ian@kintsugiheroes.com.au. Now let's get back to the story. So I started working from home. It was a network marketing company, and I thought, okay, maybe, maybe that's the route because I can't go to to a typical work, if that makes sense, job, working a 9 to 5, because what employer is going to say, well, okay, Shanice, you can have a week off or a month off because you're in chronic pain, or I can't lift my head off the pillow in the morning. They're not going to do that. But I have, I have to make sure my children are okay. So I did that for a couple of years. And something inside of me just— it wasn't what I wanted to do. I wanted to be a nurse when I was younger. I did my Health and Social Care. I also, in that time, I forgot to say, I did my introductory into teaching as well. My grandad actually paid for me to do that. And this wasn't what I wanted to do. It, you know, it helped, you know, pay the bills, but it just, it didn't feel right to me. It didn't. And there was a lot of people that I now look at inspiration. I didn't then. I was like, this is just my story, you know, that used to come to me, oh, Shanice, how do you deal with this? They knew that I was in chronic pain and I still pushed on and I still carried on. 'How do you carry on? How do you keep on doing this?' You know, and I used to, you know, message them back and tell them and help them along. And that was just my life, you know, that was just my life. Why do you feel inspired by my life? It's just normal to me. Just after I had my son, actually, no, just before I had my son, so in— he was due in June of 2014. In April, I moved closer to my mum, which was just a godsend. And then I had him in the June. It was actually quite crazy because I moved in the middle of April. 2 weeks after that, I was having contractions that were hitting 100 on the machine. I didn't feel them because I'm in pain 24/7. I just felt a little bit of a twinge. So it was crazy time, in and out of hospital. It was crazy times. But when you have a higher pain threshold, you don't seem to notice that. Like, I laughed through my contractions with my daughter. I didn't really feel it. So in the— if I fast-track to 2018, I believe, I had a call from a spinal cord injury association. And they just check up on you. How are you doing? What's going on? Um, this man I've never spoke to before, so he wanted to know about my life story, etc. And of course, mine starts from birth. Um, and he said to me, have you ever thought about becoming a life coach? And I said, absolutely not. Why would you? Why would— why? Just why? You know, and then he said, "Have you ever thought about writing your own book?" And I said, "No!" I don't actually know what this man's on, like, he's talking a little bit crazy and he's being inspired by my story and I don't understand why, like, surely he works for Spinal Cord Injury Association, he must have heard this story lots of times, you know. Clearly not. And he said, would I ever become a mentor for them? So basically, a mentor is just to help people that are going through spinal cord injury, maybe just been diagnosed with something and don't really know what path to take in life and how to carry on. It's just about talking to them once a week and, you know, and helping them along. And I said, right at this present time, no, I can't. I put on my vision board that I wanted to— I put a microphone on it, okay? So I was like, we're gonna talk about our story, aren't we? We're gonna do it. That was actually previously— no, that was, I think, previously to I spoke to the man. Um, so I knew inside I wanted to do it, but I wasn't sure. That was the end of December, and I got a message from someone a couple weeks later and said, would you become a guest speaker, um, at a women's empowerment event? I was like, oh my God, I put it on the vision board, but now I'm scared, I don't want to do it. Why did you do that, Shanice? All the questions went through my head, um, but of course I said yes because I can't say no now, I've just done that, you know. Um, they wanted me to do it in February, but it wasn't accessible for me, so they wanted me to do it then in November. And then after I had this call with this man, like on social media, etc., things kept on popping up about becoming a life coach, and I was like, stop it, just go away. I don't want to do it. I'm not, I'm not, I don't want to do this. I don't want to do this. And it kept on popping up. And for about a good maybe 4 months, I was like, got to August, I was like, okay, do you know what? You're not going to leave me alone, are you? So I decided to go for it and I did it and I got my qualification and I thought, okay, now you're going to leave me alone. And I was like, what do I do with this? I don't actually know what I'm doing with this. Like, I don't know what I'm going to do with this qualification. And I worked with someone, I offered them work with me for free. Yeah, so I said okay. She came to me actually and said, I haven't spoken to you in a while, we're just friends on social media, um, I've been going through some stuff. And I said, oh, you know, I've done this as well. And she said, 'Yeah, I wouldn't come to anyone else.' I said, 'About what?' And she said, 'I've had health problems, and the last year I haven't been out the house because if I go out, I have to use a wheelchair, and I felt self-conscious about doing it.' So I said, 'Well, I was going to do this next year, but, you know, I'll offer you to work with me for, like, you know, a month.' for free and just, you know, to book my whole phone and see if it's actually for me because I still had no idea. I'm so pleased I did. Like, it makes me smile even just think about it now and I think, why didn't you do this before? Within 4 weeks, she sent me a photo of her out with her children and out with her husband in her wheelchair and I was just like, Wow. I don't know what I said. I can't actually tell you the steps. I have no idea. I didn't even write anything down. I just went with the flow and just went with it. And that was the point in my life and I was like, this is it. This is it. This is why I was put on this earth. I truly believe that we are all put on this earth for a reason. And that was my reason, that was my calling. This is for me. And whether I think my story's inspirational, whether I think that I'm amazing at what I do, clearly there's people out there that do feel this. So let's just do it. And let's just do it. And I did it. And It was the best decision of my life, like completely. From there, I have introduced gratitude into my life, and that was— that helped a lot. So the network marketing introduced me into personal development, which now where I am now is just absolutely crazy. You know, I left my children's father. And I felt strong enough inside. Yes, I'm still in a wheelchair. Yes, I have issues. Yes, I'm in pain 24/7. But even my mum said to me, she said, "You're actually smiling. I knew you were smiling anyway, but actually from the core." I can smile from the core. I know I'm happy. I can see my future, you know. Before, I couldn't. Before, my aim was just to make sure my children had stuff and that was it. Whereas now, yes, okay, of course it's still the same, my health has got a lot worse, but that's okay. That, that's okay because yes, it can take me tomorrow, but I know I'm happy and I know that No, I can do— I can, I can just see my future. I can see it. I don't know what's going to happen in it, but I can see tomorrow. Does that make sense?
Aveline Clark (Host) · 43:34
It makes so much sense. I, I haven't wanted to interrupt you at all, Shanice, because I'm just so captivated by you and your story. And for those people who are listening to the audio, Shanice has the most beautiful energy and this glow, and her smile is just massive. It just lights up the room and she truly is so happy. And I had a couple of questions as you went along and then I think you answered one of them. I just want to go back a little bit in your story to the point where the surgeon told you and your family, is this when you were 17, where he said, there's no nothing more we can do for you. In other words, we can't do any more surgeries. Was it that the age?
Shanice Green (Guest) · 44:14
Was it 17? I was, I think I was 19, he said that there would only one more surgery they can do for me. And yeah, that of course, that was tough, you know.
Aveline Clark (Host) · 44:27
What does that mean? In other words, we can't do any more drainage or we can't move that, the shunt, or we can't—
Shanice Green (Guest) · 44:34
because there's, because there's only a certain amount of surgeries that, like, different surgeries you can do for my conditions. And where of course you've had more surgeries the more scar tissue buildup, you know. My surgery when I was 18, they had to literally cut away the scar tissue because there was so much, you know. So the complications— there's already complications in these surgeries— is a lot higher, you know. Um, okay, I'm still here.
Aveline Clark (Host) · 45:05
You are?
Shanice Green (Guest) · 45:06
Yeah, I am. And I literally had, uh like monitoring in my brain last month. So I'm still like, yeah, it's growing back. My hair's growing back. But yeah, I had that last month where they put like a probe into your head, like they drill into your skull. And I was like, oh, that's nice. And then they put a probe into your head and just monitor, put you up to a computer. And monitor you and see where the pressure is, because I'm not feeling great at the minute at all. But touch wood, I haven't heard anything, so hopefully good news, you know, no news is good news and all that. Um, but yeah.
Aveline Clark (Host) · 45:53
Tell me, throughout all of this, I guess from the age of 10 when you ended up, you know, paralyzed, having to relearn how to function Um, did you ever feel depressed? Did you ever hit depression throughout the journey?
Shanice Green (Guest) · 46:09
I was roughly probably about 14, 15 when I was diagnosed with depression. And I'm the type of person, because of my upbringing— my— yeah, it is, it's because of my upbringing— we are just taught to fight. You just carry on, you fight, you don't really cry, you just Just get it done. Just get it done. You can cry a little bit, but not much. You know, there's a cutoff point. And looking back at that now, actually, I don't do that with my children. They can say, "I want to cry," they can cry. But that was just the way that it pushed me through. And I actually don't think it was a bad way to do it with me personally, because then I would have maybe felt sorry for myself in a kind of way. Going through surgeries, I had to focus. I had to focus, and it's the only way that my mum knew how to push me along, you know. We all parent differently, and that's just it. But no, I think I was about 14, 15 when I hit depression, and they said to me, you know, we can give you medications. I maybe took it for maybe like not even that long, a couple of months, and I said, no, I'm not doing it anymore. I'm gonna do it myself. And looking back at now, that was my mindset. My mindset pushed me through. If I didn't have my mindset, wasn't maybe as high as it was, even though I felt it wasn't, I wouldn't have been able to get through going through depression and not really wanting to be here in a sense. But I was like, you're selfish if you want to leave this earth. And leave everyone behind. That's not right. And that's what pushed me through, whether it's the right way to do it or not, but that's what got me through it. And yeah, I do have days where I can feel it coming, you know, and like the anxieties and stuff like that, but I'm in such a better place now, such a better place.
Aveline Clark (Host) · 48:12
How pivotal was becoming a mum to your life and, and I guess putting you on a completely new trajectory and mindset path?
Shanice Green (Guest) · 48:25
Oh, I think, you know, of course I don't know, but if I didn't become a mum, I don't think I would be here now. Going through pain 24/7 to the point of not being able to get out of bed and not knowing how tomorrow is going to be, if you're going to be able to function or not. Not be able to eat or drink. Like, there's so many things that I go through on a daily basis that take things out of me. Like, now it's 9:22 in the UK. By probably about 11, 12 o'clock, my energy would have gone down and I probably won't even want to move, you know. So yeah, I do think if I didn't have my children They like push me along and drive, just smile at me every day, you know, they need me. They need me on this earth. They need me to push them along, you know, and they are the most amazing children ever. I'm so proud of them. My daughter goes through so much, you know, I've had to fight for her to even see doctors, you know, and I know there's something and but no one's listening and I will carry on fighting and I will get to the end of it. That's why, you know, I teach them every single day. They do their gratitude every morning. They do their affirmations, you know. They started doing yoga a couple of years ago in the evening, you know, and they're just happy children, you know. Maybe they're— when I, when I first fell pregnant and I first had my daughter, I was so like, oh my gosh, all these parents are going out and bringing their children to soft play and bringing them here and here, and I physically couldn't. And I felt bad for that because they weren't— they couldn't do all them things. But actually, looking back now, it's not a bad thing. You know, my children had to tidy up. I remember getting told off basically by a midwife, oh, your child can't be tidying up from like the age of 3 for theirself. You know, they have to be children. And I was like, yeah, but then if they don't tidy up, then I can't get through. I'm in a wheelchair, I won't be able to get through like all their toys on the floor, you know. But I believe it's helped them, and I don't think I did wrong by them being a little bit more independent, you know.
Aveline Clark (Host) · 50:50
I love what you said, uh, earlier when you had your son and then you realized that you had to create something for your children in the event of, you know, when you leave. And the way that you speak about the work that you do and then finding your purpose and figuring that out. I was doing the sums and I was going, wow, your son was 4 and you know how old you were. And I was like, do you know how lucky you are to have figured out your purpose at this point? Is it because I know so many people, business people, those that have run successful businesses, they're in their middle ages, middle stages of life, and they're still not figuring it out. And it is a gift, I think, when you figure that out. And it definitely makes everything easy. And I'm really happy for you that you found this gift that you were born to do. And it makes sense given where you've come from and the things that you were interested in when you were a child, the nursing and then all the courses that you did. So I'm, I'm really happy for you that you've got this vocation and this, this, um, channel by which you can serve others. And it must just light you up when your clients, you know, have the wins they do.
Shanice Green (Guest) · 52:05
It's absolutely amazing. Like, one of the ladies that I work— she's actually a family member of mine— and she came to me, she's like, I need you. And I'm like, what's wrong? I go around, like, she's my older cousin, okay? She's my older cousin. Um, and she said to me, you know, I'm going through these problems. I think it's anxiety. I'm not sure. The doctors want to put me on medication. I don't want to go on it. Um, this is basically my life, like, until I accept the medication from the doctors. This is— I want to try this first. And I said, okay, like, that's my big cousin. I felt, I felt honored, you know. And it's just amazing, like, the process and the journey. And, you know, there was more things underlying that we had to work on, you know. But if you would have maybe after a year, like, or so, maybe, maybe a year or two ago, you saw her then and her confidence now and It's just amazing. It is just amazing. And it's kind of like, I was talking to another client of mine and I said, you know, thank you. I said, thank you, you know, because my clients, not only have I helped them, but they've built me up as well. My belief in me, you know, am I where I want to be in belief level? No, I'm not, you know, and there is times I think, because I just go with the flow, okay? The way that I work, I go with the flow. I, I don't have any scripts. I don't have things that I want to work on this week with them because of what they said maybe previous week, you know. I just go with the flow because I believe what comes up is supposed to come up that day, you know. And I may— like, at the beginning, I thought it was a wrong way to do it, but that just worked for me, and it works for my clients. I'm not for everyone. You know, not everyone wants to. They want to have structure, and I don't like structure at all, you know. But that works for me, that works for my clients. And now I'm at the point in my life, I'm like, no, we're not going to do it maybe the other way that people— other people do it, because then I'm not them, you know. I'm me, and I'm gonna do it my way. And my goal now, yes, okay, to make sure my children are financially stable when I leave this earth But imagine, you know, when I see it— sounds crazy, but I'm gonna say it anyway because I'm a little bit crazy— being up in heaven and being able to look down and someone says your name and someone goes, yeah, I know that lady, she changed my life, or she changed someone's life, no, like someone else's life that I know. Like, that is my goal in life, you know, like that will just light me up and just You know, all day from up there.
Aveline Clark (Host) · 54:55
Beautiful. Oh, you're making me well up. Okay, couple more questions before we finish up. I so love this conversation. I just, I'm so inspired by your bravery and your strength and your heart that, you know, through your whole life journey. What has been one of the biggest things to get you through? You've mentioned your mindset and how tough you are, and that's really evident. What else has helped pull you through and get out of, I guess, the challenge? Even though you get— you still have challenges every day.
Shanice Green (Guest) · 55:32
Yeah.
Aveline Clark (Host) · 55:32
But what has pulled you through apart from your inner strength?
Shanice Green (Guest) · 55:37
Apart from my inner strength and my children. My children are 110%, you know. My children need me, you know. They might have a bad night, of course, like they're a lot older now, so like they're 8 and 10. But, you know, if they've got— like, my daughter has asthma on top of— maybe she has a cold and her asthma kicks off, you know, and she's coughing through the night. She's gonna need me to get up. She's gonna need me to push, you know, or maybe I can't get out of bed. Okay, so she has to come to me, you know, and we have a cuddle, you know. And actually, going back to that, actually reminds me that not only was I told by the health visitor for making them tidy up, Um, it was things like, okay, what happens if your child falls over? I'm like, unless they broke their leg, they're gonna have to come to me, and then I can comfort them. I can't get to them, so they have to come to me. And I felt really bad by saying that, but it's very true. You know, we all adapt differently. We all adapt to life differently. No, there's no cookie cutter way of doing things. But also my granddad like my granddad and my mum, like, I have an amazing, I had an amazing support system as a child. Because of course my granddad's not here no more. But what it was, was I remember once I kind of, we would say feel sorry for it, but it wasn't that. I, you know, I kind of had enough. I was driving home once from hospital with my mum and I was just like, I've had enough. I've had enough. Like, this life, I've had enough. That was— and my mum said to me, she actually called me my full name. I won't say my middle names, but she said my full name, and she said, you know, Granny's watching you, you know that, right? I was like, okay, okay, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it. Like, I'm— yeah, the thought of my Granny being disappointed in me, like, I know if I leave this Earth, I'm going up there with him. You know, and he would cuss me for the rest of my life, you know what I mean? So I was just like, no, that's cool, that's cool. I want to make him proud, but I also don't want him to be disappointed in me and be annoyed with me. So yeah, like, to the point of like, when I fell pregnant, I rung my granddad. I was like, Granddad, I'm pregnant, is that okay? And he went, it's there already, isn't it? I'm like, yeah, it is, but I'm just saying, is that okay? I got my first piercing on my lip when I was 14, I was normally like 14, 15. I was like, "Grandad, am I allowed to get it?" And he's like, "Just don't come to me if it gets infected, okay?" Yes, Grandad. Yes, Grandad. Like, I wouldn't do anything without my grandad's permission. Like, it's quite funny how it is. Like, he's like on this pedestal, you know, like my king. And it's like, if he don't want me to do something, I won't do it. I wouldn't do it. So yeah, no, like my thought of— and even my mum, like, you know, I would hate my mum to be disappointed in me, like absolutely. You know, she says to me all the time, you know, you're my inspiration, you carry on like you always have been. I'm like, I'm just your child, you know. I didn't say that, I was like, why? You know, you've pushed me along and I've pushed you along, you know. I believe that she's become a stronger person because of all the things I had to go through. But no, I think with people, other people, like some people, you know, they look at like celebrities and stuff like that. I don't look at celebrities. I don't, I don't, I don't think, you know, oh my gosh, I wish I was like— I don't know. As long as I make my family happy, you know, and then I'm all good. It's like I have my family, I don't need, I don't need The lavish things, I would love that, I'm not gonna lie, like, you know, being able to treat my— see, even treat my family. If I bring that back to, you know, treating my family and stuff like that. But as long as I'm blessed, you know, I'm blessed and I'm very lucky because there's people out there that don't have the support system that I have, you know. But no, that's what keeps me going.
Aveline Clark (Host) · 59:46
Oh, so, so beautiful. So I'm so happy that you've had such an amazing family and support system and the hospital you went to. And all those experiences, like, you've clearly learned from them all, um, good or bad. They've made you a stronger person. And I love the way that you're just so happy and smiling, and you're, you're living on purpose, you know. You're able to give back and help others who have— are going through similar things or similar challenges and in different ways. It's, um, it's beautiful. You're an amazing person, let me say that.
Shanice Green (Guest) · 1:00:19
Okay, I'm not very good at taking compliments, but I'll say thank you.
Aveline Clark (Host) · 1:00:27
All right, my last question for you: if there is someone listening to this who is going through anything or that is similar to any part of your story, is there something you'd like to say to them?
Shanice Green (Guest) · 1:00:40
I actually want to say to everyone, you know, whether I inspire you or not, Nobody is perfect, but you are perfectly yourself. Nobody can do you better than you. You know, there's people out there, you know, that have, um, that are inspired by you, or maybe, you know, you have that the green-eyed monster in them, you know, they want to be just like you, but they can't be you. You know, you are you. And whether you look at other people and think, oh my gosh, I wish I had them. You don't actually wish you had their life. You don't actually want their car, their partner, their children. You want your own life, you know. But take their life to inspire you to carry on pushing, rather than saying I want what they've got. You want your own. You want your own things, you know. But no, nobody is perfect, but you are perfectly yourself just the way you are. As long as you're happy in yourself, it's all good. All good.
Aveline Clark (Host) · 1:01:46
Thank you. What a lovely way to finish up. And I wish you a blessed, magical day. And I hope that when you do hit 11 AM or lunchtime, that you find a little bit of spark of energy when you think about this conversation and how many people that you're going to impact by sharing your story. Because I can tell you there'll be a lot of them. And I'm really, really grateful for your, your heart, your openness, your vulnerability, and everything that you've given to us. Thank you so much, Shanice.
Shanice Green (Guest) · 1:02:16
Thank you too. And, uh, yeah, you're on the other side of the world, so you can go and get ready for bed.
Aveline Clark (Host) · 1:02:25
We hope you've enjoyed this episode of Kintsugi Heroes. Please like and share the show to your friends so so we can get this out to even more people. If you have a story you'd like to share with us, please reach out using the contact details below. Join us next week for our next hero story. Until then, keep being you, and remember that we are all heroes in our own unique way.
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